Counting down: my 5 least favorite Meat Loaf songs

Since I’ve started using Last.fm in March 2006, I played 989 Meat Loaf songs. Being the geek that I am, I wanted to pay some special attention to the last 11. I’ll tackle those in three parts: today, I’ll play my 5 least favorite Meat Loaf songs, tomorrow is for my favorite rarity, and on Wednesday, in the final countdown, I’ll take a stab at the definite Meat Loaf top 5. And of course, I’ll write some, *ahum* insightful comments.

Here’s my Top 5 Least Favorite Meat Loaf Songs.

5. Thrashin’

“Thrashin'” was recorded for the 1986 movie of the same name. The only thing going for it is it’s relative obscurity: it can only be found in the movie itself. The first minute and a half play over the opening sequence, and most of the song is heard behind the ending credits. When you splice both bits together, you get a completely forgettable song, whose sound quality isn’t all that either. I still got some blanks in the lyrics, so if anyone has a clue …
⇒ Thrashin’ [3.6MB, Right click, save as…]

4. You’re Right, I Was Wrong

On several occasions I have accused Diane Warren of writing crappy songs. Which would explain why two of her songs made this list. “You’re Right, I Was Wrong” is the weakest track on Couldn’t Have Said It Better and should have been shelved in favor of either of the two non-album B-sides.

3. A Man and a Woman

The token duet on Blind Before I Stop. As I write this, I can’t even remember how the song goes.

2. Cry Over Me

If this was a list of the worst Meat Loaf songs, I’m fairly sure I would have put this in first place. The it’s a boring, boring song with a pre-chorus that makes me itch in places I just can’t reach. Every time I hear mr. Loaf sing It’s so easy for you-ooo-oooh / To feel nothing for me-eee-eeeh I want to break stuff. And I don’t think a ballad is supposed to do that to you.
Official video.

1. Paradise by the Dashboard Light

Of course, “Paradise” isn’t a bad song. It’s just horribly overplayed. I’ve heard it so often that it would be perfectly alright with me if I would never hear it again. Mr. Loaf can skip it in his concerts for all I care, every DJ should shamelessly mock everyone who requests it for whatever reason, and the people who act it out on the dancefloor of whatever second-rate disco in some hillbilly village should be taken outside and be roughhoused by a pair of hungover stuffed animals.
The best live version I ever witnessed was shown on Dutch television on December 26th, 1998. Harry Mulisch was featured in De show van je leven, and as it turns out, “Paradise” is one of the very few pop songs he can appreciate. Que mr. Loaf and the Neverland Express, ripping through that song in less then 5 minutes. Unfortunatly, I don’t have a recording of that, [Edit february 2018: it’s on YouTube now!] so on a totally unrelated note, I’ll point you towards an alternate video, made to tie in with Leap of Faith, in which Meat plays a bus driver.

See you tomorrow for something obscure.