First Lines: Funny Fantasy/Science Fiction/Horror

Where Alex Shvartsman’s Unidentified Funny Objects collections (mostly) contain all new funny fiction, his series of Funny Fantasy / Science Fiction / Horror anthologies contain reprints of humorous genre fiction.

Now, of course, the boundaries between these genres is vague at best. And with the recurrence of several authors across all three volumes, read in rapid succession, in the end it all got a kind of samey. But there were definitely some good stories:

My favorites from Funny Fantasy include Tim Pratt’s “Another End of the Empire,” in which a Dark Lord gets the end of his reign foretold by an oracle; “A Mild Case of Death” by David Gerrold that gives the so-you-died-and-this-what-happens-next tale an excellent spin; and finally “Librarians in the Branch Library of Babel” by Shaenon K. Garrity, which takes on Borges’ infinite library of Babel (you know, the one which contains all possible permutations of all possible books) and contains the excellent line “…to me all books are ‘Moby-Dick,’ it’s just that some of them are really badly misprinted.”

In Funny Science Fiction Garrity’s “Flying on My Hatred of My Neighbor’s Dog” proposes a new energy source, making interstellar travel possible. “Miss Darcy’s First Intergalactic Ballet Class” by Dantzel Cherry delivers just what its title promises, “Whaliens” by Lavie Tidhar was delightful and contains Alien Whales from Outer Space, an finally there’s “Chicka-Chicka-Bow-Wow” by Mike Rimar, about an interplanetary porn star sent on a diplomatic mission.

Finally, from Funny Horror: “Kvetchula’s Daughter” by Darrell Schweitzer is about a daughter who has completely had it with her jewish vampire mom. Amanda C. Davis’ “Good Neighbors” was weird, but good weird. Tarl Kudrick’s “Hot Fudge and Whipped Cream” features a genie who gets tricked, and in “The God Whisperer” by Daniel J. Davis, Jack has a unruly little War God who needs some training.

Book read
Funny Fantasy, edited by Alex Shvartsman
First line
IT WAS WHEN a rat rose up on its hind legs and spoke to me in the middle of the street at one o’clock in the morning that I realized that this night was going to be different from all other nights. (Dave the Mighty Steel-Thewed Avenger, by Laura Resnick)
Book read
Funny Science Fiction, edited by Alex Shvartsman
First line
Diary entry #17: It has been a long, hard struggle, but of course if the conquest of the galaxy is your goal, you don’t expect it to come easily. (Observation Post, by Mike Resnick)
Book read
Funny Horror, edited by Alex Shvartsman
First line
I AM EMMELINE. I am six. (No Children, No Pets, by Esther Friesner)